The Single Non-Negotiable of a Strong Friendship

“A fabulous friendship multiplies the good in life.”  –Unknown

Life can be crazy. It can be overwhelming. Even downright cruel.

It can also be beautiful. Magical. Forgiving. And freaking amazing.

We have never been designed to walk this life alone. We were divinely created to experience this world with others in a rich, meaningful way. Every relationship serves a purpose.

Some people enter our lives for a season. They meet a need in us that only God understands. They may provide guidance or support when we need it most. Others challenge us far beyond the limits we’ve set for ourselves. They expose our weaknesses for all they’re worth. If we’re smart about it, we take the lesson and grow from it.

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The First Step to Create the Life You Want

Same story, different day.

Alarm. To-do list. Dinner. Bed. Repeat.

Many of us live on auto-pilot to meet the hectic demands we’ve created for ourselves. We run around, half desensitized to the world around us because our next errand or commitment is so important right now. We may be productive, accomplished and secure, but are we really happy?

In the middle of the “business as usual” routine, if something isn’t quite right, our inner voice starts to pipe up. Something in us clicks.

We want more in life. In our careers and our relationships.

It’s time to wipe the slate clean. It’s time to rebuild and create the life we want.

Starting from scratch is a bitch, isn’t it? It’s a wild idea to walk away from something good to create something better. In fact, it can be downright terrifying. But sometimes starting fresh is the only way to do it.

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Life Lessons I’ve Learned From My Dogs

The garage door opens and it begins. Bark! Shriek! Tale whip! Repeat!

I don’t know who’s more excited for the door to open, me or the dogs.

Let’s play! Lick. Paw to the face! Lick. Just another day in the “Jay” household.

You get this. Our pets aren’t animals, they’re family.

It always amazes my husband and I how we’re unconditionally loved by them. We have Sadie the “dingo” (more likely terrier) mix and Fritzy the boxer. They’re both rescues. Sadie was found at a trash dump in Texas and Fritzy on a dirt road in Las Vegas. And now they rule the house.

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The White-Knuckled Truth About Letting Go

Your heart is pounding. Chest is tight. Hands are shaking. Vision a little questionable.

You want to Hurl. This Person. Across. The Room.

Someone just pulled your trigger. Maybe they didn’t know it. Maybe they did it with a smile on their face.

The anger you feel in response can be monumental. Some wounds cut so dang deep the recovery seems impossible. Forget the mental exhaustion. You’re hurt, pissed off, and backed into a corner.

Whether it’s a family member, a friendship, or someone who plays a major role in your life… We all have one or two people who drive us I-N-S-A-N-E. There’s “I love you and you drive me nuts” insane and there’s “Your bad habits/toxicity/poor decision making/selfishness affects my life” insane. If you fall under the latter category you’ve got a decision to make.

Do you keep battling a ghost, or let it go and move on? 

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5 Ways To Get What You Want In The New Year

The glitter is gone, the champagne has run out, and the reality check is here. If you’re like me, you really (really!) want to make friends with the New Year. There are a lot of good things we want for ourselves and the ones we love.

I’ll admit, I usually make multiple resolutions. Last year I took a big leap of faith and I’ll be doing the same this year.

At some point in our lives we have to get aggressive and unapologetically go after what we want and deserve. Good health, solid relationships and career advancement doesn’t magically appear. We have to work our asses off to get and keep them.

For a fresh start we typically purge the system, right? For example, we have a garage sale to de-clutter out the house or start a wholesome diet to clean up our health. (By the way, I just started a cleanse and I’m starving. Too many Christmas cookies!)

What is it you want this year?

Let’s clean out the crap that doesn’t serve us and make us better people so we can go after what we really want.

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The Real Damage of Feeling “Offended”

‘Tis the season for people to get ridiculously… offended.

If you do a google search for “offended” a long, long list of news stories pop up. Many people will jump head first into a so-called controversy, work themselves into a tizzy over it, and then demand an apology. It sounds exhausting to me.

Whether it’s over faith, education, parenting, or whatever, it generally goes the same:

“You hurt my feelings/made me mad because you don’t agree with me.” 

Then the backlash starts, much of it online. Unnecessary arguments explode, people get upset, the drama grows.

But here’s the real problem. 

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